Being a parent can be hard. There are the obvious things. Things like having your time stretched as thin as possible. Things like getting yelled at by a 3 foot dictator. Things like being tired. ALL THE TIME.
But then there are the things that are hard that people don't normally think about. Things like punishing a naughty child. Things like handling a sick kid. Things like wiping someone else's boogers and behind.
I wouldn't trade being a father for anything. The friends that I don't see, the parties I've missed, the vacations to Vegas that don't happen anymore, none of that matters. I can honestly say I'd rather be home wiping up boogers and wrangling up a wiggling 3 month old than out playing on my own. In fact, as I write this Ellie is trying to do a ninja flip out of my arms.
Of course I miss doing some of that stuff. I miss the friends that I don't see anymore. But, teaching someone how to behave and then having love reciprocated, trumps any fun I could have doing otherwise.
There is no greater feeling than having your child come up to you, unprovoked, and having them gush about how much they love you. Lucy runs up to me daily and says, "Dad, you know what? I love you". Keep your parties.
But the punishment is hard. I'm such a baby about it all. If I have to raise my voice or give a little bum tap (yes I do that), I end up crying afterwards. So manly, right? But I have to be diligent. Don't want my kids growing up to be jerk faces.
So for now my role is to be a role model. To be a father. To be a best friend. I enjoy my time dancing in the kitchen as a "princess daddy" and my time taking my kids on walks through scenic trails. One day I won't have that opportunity. There will be no more sick kids requesting banana suckers to cure their ailments. There won't be dances in the kitchen. My kids will grow and they'll out grow childish things. By that time I want them to understand how important they've always been to me and I want them to be well adjusted people. I want them to remember how daddy was always there for them and not off doing selfish things. There is nothing in this life more important than trying to make this place better for your own children.
Lucille and Eleanor, your mother and my world starts and ends with you two beautiful girls. Always and forever.
